Someday we’ll do a Tuesday Tribute to the hilarity that is Julie Brown (not Downtown Julie Brown, because she was the opposite of funny) but the Julie Brown who brought us “I’m a Blonde,” “Just Say Julie,” and a dozen other brilliant moments from when the M in MTV stood for music.
But not today, because it’s Friday and tomorrow is Homecoming, bitches. That’s right: I’m heading to my 15th college reunion. Like in 1-5, like in if I’d had a baby when I graduated from Bethany College, she’d be studying for PSATs and getting her learner’s permit. Fortunately, though, I postponed parenthood and the internet went viral, so here I am, sharing this gem with you.
What I really love about this particular YouTube clip is that it was recorded from “Just Say Julie”–and I think it might even have been the episode in which Julie has PMS and fires her entire crew, and spends the entire show eating Oreos and weeping. It’s also the episode in which she’s watching “Lost in Your Eyes,” and she says, “Debbie Gibson’s wearing a hat. I don’t have the CHEEKbones for a HAT!” a line which my sister and I still use when we have the opportunity to try on a fedora.
Of course, this song would never have been written today, because in the intervening years, too many kids actually HAVE gone Carrie on their classmates. So this tribute to psychopathic, gun-toting high school students, waging a massacre against their fellow partygoers, is really a swan song of a more innocent age. We miss you, Debbie.