Need backup? Call Keanu Reeves 2.0.

Next time you’re in trouble, call on the Keanu Reeves Mash-Up Bot, which has all the features you’d expect from a Keanu Reeves MUB. He speaks forty languages, including San Dimas, San Diego, and Sanskrit; he stops bullets with his mind, travels in time, and has sex with three-headed sirens. His skills in the courtroom, the bedroom, and hell are unmatched. And he’s all yours for six easy payments of $39.99. (Telephone booth not included.)

NOTE: KR-MUB 2.0 has resolved most of the bugs from KR-MUB 1.0, including the so-called “Volkswagen bug.” Seeing a VW Bug on the street will no longer trigger KR-MUB to launch into Crispin Glover’s “Get down” speech.

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